Sexual Abuse Within Family

I realize this is a sensitive subject. In fact, I'm not comfortable with it either. However, I believe this information to be too important not to share.

In the terrible event of an older brother/ sister sexually abusing a younger sibling a common "solution" is to take the offender away from the family. This creates even more problems because EVERYTHING in the family has changed. No one is able to talk. Dr. Madanes has a different idea.

Dr. Madanes came up with a very controversial method of counseling that I really like.
 ~this is done with all the members of the family present, including the "offender" and the "victim"~

1. Don't take the child away from the parents/ family.
2. Discuss ALL the details, ask all the members to explain what they knew, how they felt, what EXACTLY had happened. It is natural for families to never discuss the details because it's uncomfortable but it is beneficial because then no one feels like they have secrets from each other and once everything is out in the open it can be easier to deal with.
3. Ask each individual member why it was wrong.
4. Explain that a large reason why it was wrong is because it hurt the "victim's" spirit. DO NOT SAY DAMAGED OR BROKEN! This can lead them to believe that this will define them for the rest of their lives.
5. Discuss how it hurt all the family members.
6. After agreeing that it was indeed a terrible thing, have the "offender" get down on their knees and apologize to the "victim." Make them keep doing it until it is sincere. This may take a couple minutes or it could take weeks but DO NOT let the offender quit if you don't believe it to be a sincere apology.
7. Explain to "victim" that they have the choice whether or not to forgive.
8. Have all the members of the family apologize to each other sincerely.
9. Have the family set clear boundaries, expectations, and consequences if something like that ever happens again!
10. Have the "offender" create a plan for restitution. Ex: the "offender" could work part time and give all the money to "victim's" future college fund.

I think this has a lot of power. I wish we could live in a world where it wasn't necessary to even think about things like this but it is at least nice to know a way to help.